I got to interview Hotlanta Salsa Congress music headliner Luisito Rosario. He was really nice and very gracious. I'm really stoked because dancing to live music is a whole different dynamic than dancing to a DJ.
Even his speaking voice is smooth and velvety. :D
BTW, you can read all about it here.
Friday, September 14, 2012
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Welcome, oh, welcome...
...to my little blog
I've begun this whole thing to clear up some fog
About dancing and etiquette and unspoken rules
to those who violate them and act like big fools
Sometimes it's just me ranting and raving
Sometimes it's dance pros on how we're behaving
There are also events and articles too
To bring the dance info closer to you
Dance professionals, if you have something to say
Even if it's blunt, I'll quote you anyway
I love every subject, no topic's taboo
If you're a dance pro with an opinion, I'll interview you
I'm based in Atlanta, but don't ever fear
We can talk on the phone or whenever you're here
Dancers really need to know what you think
So their footwork and manners won't start to stink
Dancers, give comments, opinions, and thoughts
Get the dialogue going to work out those knots
Of feelings unexpressed and words left unsaid
So the morale of the dance scene won't end up dead
If there's something you want perspectives about
List it below or give me a shout
I'm available on twitter, Facebook, and also G+
Tracking me down is really no fuss
This is a project for us all to explore
Be patient, I've never done this before
I hope to expand this idea even more
With all that said, see ya on the floor!
I've begun this whole thing to clear up some fog
About dancing and etiquette and unspoken rules
to those who violate them and act like big fools
Sometimes it's just me ranting and raving
Sometimes it's dance pros on how we're behaving
There are also events and articles too
To bring the dance info closer to you
Dance professionals, if you have something to say
Even if it's blunt, I'll quote you anyway
I love every subject, no topic's taboo
If you're a dance pro with an opinion, I'll interview you
I'm based in Atlanta, but don't ever fear
We can talk on the phone or whenever you're here
Dancers really need to know what you think
So their footwork and manners won't start to stink
Dancers, give comments, opinions, and thoughts
Get the dialogue going to work out those knots
Of feelings unexpressed and words left unsaid
So the morale of the dance scene won't end up dead
If there's something you want perspectives about
List it below or give me a shout
I'm available on twitter, Facebook, and also G+
Tracking me down is really no fuss
This is a project for us all to explore
Be patient, I've never done this before
I hope to expand this idea even more
With all that said, see ya on the floor!
Written exclusively for Dance Infotainment and Dancing4Fun.
Image stolen from Jimmy Rumba. I guess I'm never running for public office.
Friday, August 3, 2012
Etiquette Series: Nasty Comments about Performances
There is an unspoken problem in the dance world that really needs to be breached. Anyone who is a regular in the social dance scene knows that there are several performance teams out there that perform at dance socials, parties, congresses, etc. Sadly, anyone who is a regular in the dance scene also knows that there is an unfortunately large crop of haters out there that can't wait to insult said performance teams.
I've personally been on dance teams
twice. Both times, I overheard nasty gossip about myself, heard nasty
comments made about my team when the haters thought we were out of
earshot, or worse, when we had changed clothes and they couldn't
recognize us and went right on flappin' their jaws. I've also heard myriads of nasty comments made about other
dance teams, particularly about the physical condition of some women
on certain dance teams.
“I can't believe SHE is wearing
THAT!”
“Couldn't they have found a costume
to fit HER?”
“I sure as hell wouldn't wear THAT
costume if I looked like HER!”
“OMG! What does SHE think she's doing
on a performance team?”
We've probably all heard these or
similar things said at least once, if not several times. A few of us
may have said similar things a few times. Well, knock it off. If
you've done it before, admit your mistake and vow not to do it again.
Attitudes like that are toxic. You are polluting the dance scene with
your discouraging attitude. You are stunting the growth of more
dancers than you realize.
Just think, the very girl you were criticizing may have been really inspired another girl, perhaps one who is built similarly, but is afraid to join a dance team. She saw the same girl you did, but she saw the positive, she saw her own potential mirrored in that girl.
Then she overhears your nasty comment about the girl she thought was inspiring. In a second, you've dashed her confidence to the floor. So, she stays home, doesn't join a dance team even though she really wants to, and doesn't grow as a dancer. Ask me how I know that can happen. Go ahead, ask me. I dare you.
Then she overhears your nasty comment about the girl she thought was inspiring. In a second, you've dashed her confidence to the floor. So, she stays home, doesn't join a dance team even though she really wants to, and doesn't grow as a dancer. Ask me how I know that can happen. Go ahead, ask me. I dare you.
With that said, do you see how damaging
your negativity is? If you REALLY can't say something nice SHUT UP, at least wait til you're at home with someone who isn't
in the dance scene at all because you also never know how loose somebody's
lips are. Not to mention, when people hear you say things like that,
they never quite look at you the same way again.
So, actually, it's preferable for you
to just shut up.
“A friend told me about a girl who
made a rude comment about our dance team,” says Tess Khan, a
performer with Stiletto Dance Company, “The next day, she
ran up to me smiling and hugged me, not knowing that I knew she had
laughed at our routine, and she never even acknowledged anything
about the performance, good or bad.”
How unfortunate! Even if a dance team
completely bombs, the people on it are still worthy of some
recognition for bravery and hard work. Perhaps people watch “Dancing
with the Stars” or “So You Think You Can Dance” and think that
it's normal to learn a whole routine in a day or a week and if
somebody can't do it, there's something wrong with her. Perhaps
people think that only a few body types are “allowed” to dance
(or even allowed out of the house). Perhaps they don't know the
difficult, painstaking, emotional work it takes to perform a dance
number, particularly if you're a beginner or if you're trying to
downsize your shyness.
Another dancer for Stiletto Dance
Company, Kimberly "BachataGata" concurs, “If someone is brave enough to
perform for any sized crowd, in my eyes, that person is a fabulous
dancer. It takes months of physical and mental preparation and
commitment to put together a routine. There is always growth
occurring, which is an intense process at any level.”
Provided some dance teams or some
individual dancers totally mess up a performance. It's an
inevitability, but it's also a part of the growth process and the
positive should be nurtured, rather than the negative being
emphasized.
Kimberly continues, “I have deep
respect for anyone who gets on stage to share their personal growth.
They deserve our most exuberant applause."
Indeed.
Of course, some people will be
apologists for the poisonous behavior, saying, “Well, it's up to
you to have confidence in yourself and to not let those comments get
you down. The people who say that just have issues themselves so you
can't take it personally.”
…but it is personal and it is
hurtful. The “be confident in yourself” attitude does have some
truth to it, but it can breed a toxicity of its own. Yes, you should
join a dance team for YOU and not so you can earn praise from others.
Yes, you should continue dancing if YOU enjoy it and it makes YOU
grow. Nonetheless, nonconstructive, cruel criticism is an unpleasant,
difficult thing to have to deal with and telling people they need to
“be confident” is, frankly, insulting. It asserts that they're to
blame for having bruises where their hearts were kicked. It asserts
that they're weak and just don't know how to handle their emotions.
It asserts that their emotions are wrong and that they aren't allowed
to have them. Worst of all, it lets the jerkwads get off scot-free!
Don't make nasty comments and don't
excuse nasty comments. Next time you hear someone saying something
negative about ANY dance team (because you WILL hear it), correct
them. Stand up for those that are brave enough to put themselves out
there to be judged, scrutinized and possibly ridiculed. Let people
know that their venomous attitudes are not welcome in the dance
world. Most importantly, always congratulate the performers if you
have the chance, even if they messed up, even if they don't look
great in their costumes, even if you didn't like the choreography.
You are nurturing their confidence and growth and they will thank you
for it.
If you happen to be one of the people
who criticizes dance teams, I have two words for you: Join
one.
Image stolen from catmacros.wordpress.com who likely stole it from someone else.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Kizomba.....it's frickin' hard!
I had a blast at Dancing4Fun's Latin Dance Classic. I took several classes that I think will help me as a dancer overall. I also got interviews with all of the instructors about technique, etiquette, lead/follow, etc.
The one thing I couldn't seem to nail down, which was a brand new dance for me, was kizomba. It's not that I'm a slow learner, but that kizomba is a frickin' hard dance!
If you're curious about what kizomba is, I honestly wouldn't tell you to look it up on Youtube, at least not without explaining a few things. First and foremost, kizomba is not a presentational dance. By that, I mean it's absolutely NOT meant to be performed or judged or critiqued in the way that other dancer are (though I'm sure it doesn't stop people from doing so). You can't really do very elaborate styling and tricks that you could in other dances. Secondly, if you're a dancer and you watch it, you will probably think, "Oh, that's easy...what's the big deal? These people aren't even really doing anything. Why do people even want to learn this? I bet I can learn it in five minutes."
Good luck with that because I've gotten to a point where I pick up dances pretty quickly and after a *THREE HOUR* workshop, I'm still clueless and so is everyone else that was in the very same workshop.
The point of kizomba seems to be more about being close with someone and feeling the music. Because you're so close with someone, it's actually hard to do the dance because it's tough not to step on each other.
So, we shall see what kizomba looks like in the US. I really hope it doesn't get hijacked by overzealous performers that want to make a show out of everything....but we'll see.
Keep checking out my blog because I'm going to have some really cool pieces very soon that feature various dance instructors' advice and opinions and you won't want to miss that.
The one thing I couldn't seem to nail down, which was a brand new dance for me, was kizomba. It's not that I'm a slow learner, but that kizomba is a frickin' hard dance!
If you're curious about what kizomba is, I honestly wouldn't tell you to look it up on Youtube, at least not without explaining a few things. First and foremost, kizomba is not a presentational dance. By that, I mean it's absolutely NOT meant to be performed or judged or critiqued in the way that other dancer are (though I'm sure it doesn't stop people from doing so). You can't really do very elaborate styling and tricks that you could in other dances. Secondly, if you're a dancer and you watch it, you will probably think, "Oh, that's easy...what's the big deal? These people aren't even really doing anything. Why do people even want to learn this? I bet I can learn it in five minutes."
Good luck with that because I've gotten to a point where I pick up dances pretty quickly and after a *THREE HOUR* workshop, I'm still clueless and so is everyone else that was in the very same workshop.
The point of kizomba seems to be more about being close with someone and feeling the music. Because you're so close with someone, it's actually hard to do the dance because it's tough not to step on each other.
So, we shall see what kizomba looks like in the US. I really hope it doesn't get hijacked by overzealous performers that want to make a show out of everything....but we'll see.
Keep checking out my blog because I'm going to have some really cool pieces very soon that feature various dance instructors' advice and opinions and you won't want to miss that.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
OH EM GEE! 2nd Annual Atlanta Latin Dance Classic July 27-29
I know, I already posted an article I wrote about the LDC, but I wanted to share my personal excitement about it!
So....there are a bunch of really talented couples coming from all over the US to teach really cool stuff, but the two most interesting things happening, in my opinion, are:
Jorge Elizondo's Bachata Choreography Class
Ivan & Isa....period.
I've taken classes from Jorge Elizondo before. He's pretty strict to be honest, but he gets down to the nuts and bolts, which is good. Too many salseros are actually...well...shitty dancers. There, I said it. They might know interesting tricks and they might be able to find people that can lead/follow them, but most of them have no real fundamental basis of dance in general. My personal opinion is that it's because many of them don't take actual lessons and kind of learn on the street/in the club where they're only dancing with other people who learned on the street/in the club. It can be hard for the blind to lead or follow the blind....unfortunately, this is the status of salsa.
Jorge Elizondo does get to those very basic things that even some "advanced" salsa dancers are lacking. He talks really specifically about leading, following, connection, rhythm, isolations, and what seem like minute details about movement, but are really quite important. To have this guy teaching an actual number is pretty great! I'm admittedly a bit intimidated, but I think it will be awesome....or if it's not I can go take something else.
The other thing this Ivan and Isa. They're coming all the way from Spain to tiny little Gwinnett County, GA. That is pretty dang cool by itself. The other thing that will be awesome is that they will be teaching a lot of kizomba. Just my personal opinion, but I think kizomba is going to be the next big standard addition to social Latin dance. It used to just be salsa and merengue. Then, bachata kind of came out of nowhere and now it's salsa, bachata, merengue. Well, kizomba keeps creeping in, but it's not that popular in the US...YET!
According to the guy who runs this event, whose name is Sean Christopher, kizomba is BIG in Europe, which is why he brought a couple from Europe in to teach it. Currently, it seems like a footnote in Latin dance gatherings and congresses...there might be two classes for a whole weekend-long event...but it's going to be pretty heavily featured at the LDC. There will be *FIVE* FRIGGIN HOURS of kizomba classes at the LDC and it's going to be a part of the daily dance socials as well.
...which could be very embarrassing for me, but I'm going to try anyway!
Honestly, anything that expands salseros' minds is a good thing. Not to get anybody's panties in a wad, but salseros are pretty narrow minded when it comes to dancing. They only like their own little dance world. They're not really interested in learning other dances. The only way to get them to open their minds is to sneak other dances in to events that are majority salsa.The same might be true of other dance types, but every other dance type I've tried to learn, it seemed the people were much more diversified (and better leaders).
So, I'm super-stoked to see kizomba being thrown in to the mix and I wonder what the next thing will be. I'll be posting a totally informal, opinionated review here and will, of course, do a professional article for Examiner.com.
BTW, here's the link to the LDC site where you can get tix, schedule, instructor bios, blablabla: http://latindanceclassic.com/
Lead me on the dance floor, but follow me on twitter @danceinfotainme.
So....there are a bunch of really talented couples coming from all over the US to teach really cool stuff, but the two most interesting things happening, in my opinion, are:
Jorge Elizondo's Bachata Choreography Class
Ivan & Isa....period.
I've taken classes from Jorge Elizondo before. He's pretty strict to be honest, but he gets down to the nuts and bolts, which is good. Too many salseros are actually...well...shitty dancers. There, I said it. They might know interesting tricks and they might be able to find people that can lead/follow them, but most of them have no real fundamental basis of dance in general. My personal opinion is that it's because many of them don't take actual lessons and kind of learn on the street/in the club where they're only dancing with other people who learned on the street/in the club. It can be hard for the blind to lead or follow the blind....unfortunately, this is the status of salsa.
Jorge Elizondo does get to those very basic things that even some "advanced" salsa dancers are lacking. He talks really specifically about leading, following, connection, rhythm, isolations, and what seem like minute details about movement, but are really quite important. To have this guy teaching an actual number is pretty great! I'm admittedly a bit intimidated, but I think it will be awesome....or if it's not I can go take something else.
The other thing this Ivan and Isa. They're coming all the way from Spain to tiny little Gwinnett County, GA. That is pretty dang cool by itself. The other thing that will be awesome is that they will be teaching a lot of kizomba. Just my personal opinion, but I think kizomba is going to be the next big standard addition to social Latin dance. It used to just be salsa and merengue. Then, bachata kind of came out of nowhere and now it's salsa, bachata, merengue. Well, kizomba keeps creeping in, but it's not that popular in the US...YET!
According to the guy who runs this event, whose name is Sean Christopher, kizomba is BIG in Europe, which is why he brought a couple from Europe in to teach it. Currently, it seems like a footnote in Latin dance gatherings and congresses...there might be two classes for a whole weekend-long event...but it's going to be pretty heavily featured at the LDC. There will be *FIVE* FRIGGIN HOURS of kizomba classes at the LDC and it's going to be a part of the daily dance socials as well.
...which could be very embarrassing for me, but I'm going to try anyway!
Honestly, anything that expands salseros' minds is a good thing. Not to get anybody's panties in a wad, but salseros are pretty narrow minded when it comes to dancing. They only like their own little dance world. They're not really interested in learning other dances. The only way to get them to open their minds is to sneak other dances in to events that are majority salsa.The same might be true of other dance types, but every other dance type I've tried to learn, it seemed the people were much more diversified (and better leaders).
So, I'm super-stoked to see kizomba being thrown in to the mix and I wonder what the next thing will be. I'll be posting a totally informal, opinionated review here and will, of course, do a professional article for Examiner.com.
BTW, here's the link to the LDC site where you can get tix, schedule, instructor bios, blablabla: http://latindanceclassic.com/
Lead me on the dance floor, but follow me on twitter @danceinfotainme.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Dance travesties
These happened....and we all stood by idly and let them happen! We are all guilty:
The Roger Rabbit
The Macarena
The Achy Brakey Heart
The Sprinkler
The Electric Slide
Cotton Eye Joe
The ChaCha Slide
The Cupid Shuffle
The Robot
And the mother of all terrible dances.....
THEWHYYYYYYY M C A Y-M-C-A!
How sad is it that after what, 40 years, people still screw up the letter formations every time?!
Yes, I understand the necessities of these dances. People who are shy and afraid of looking like asses on the dance floor are guaranteed to be surrounded by other people looking like asses on the dance floor. Assery in numbers reduces the individual risk of ego damage by 77.3%.
Whatever it takes to get people on the dance floor should be seen as a positive thing. However, these dances are merely self-fulfilling prophecies. People who dance these dances are usually not going to learn other dances. What is the likelihood that, even if you are super awesome dancer #1, that someone will approach you and say, "Wow! You are so amazing at The Macarena. Where did you learn to dance like that? You must be a dance teacher. Where can I take lessons?"
In other words, as much as we wish these were gateway substances that lead folks to the highly addictive drug of dance, they're just gateways to Facebook-tagged party footage that will prevent you from running for office within the next 100 years.
....all that said, if I ever get married, I'll probably play every damn one of 'em at my wedding. -sigh- On a brighter note, if I ever get married, THERE WILL BE AN OPEN BAR, as there should be at every wedding.
The Roger Rabbit
The Macarena
The Achy Brakey Heart
The Sprinkler
The Electric Slide
Cotton Eye Joe
The ChaCha Slide
The Cupid Shuffle
The Robot
And the mother of all terrible dances.....
THE
How sad is it that after what, 40 years, people still screw up the letter formations every time?!
Yes, I understand the necessities of these dances. People who are shy and afraid of looking like asses on the dance floor are guaranteed to be surrounded by other people looking like asses on the dance floor. Assery in numbers reduces the individual risk of ego damage by 77.3%.
Whatever it takes to get people on the dance floor should be seen as a positive thing. However, these dances are merely self-fulfilling prophecies. People who dance these dances are usually not going to learn other dances. What is the likelihood that, even if you are super awesome dancer #1, that someone will approach you and say, "Wow! You are so amazing at The Macarena. Where did you learn to dance like that? You must be a dance teacher. Where can I take lessons?"
In other words, as much as we wish these were gateway substances that lead folks to the highly addictive drug of dance, they're just gateways to Facebook-tagged party footage that will prevent you from running for office within the next 100 years.
....all that said, if I ever get married, I'll probably play every damn one of 'em at my wedding. -sigh- On a brighter note, if I ever get married, THERE WILL BE AN OPEN BAR, as there should be at every wedding.
We should all be so cute when making asses of ourselves.
Saturday, July 21, 2012
2nd Annual Latin Dance Classic July 27-29
The Gwinnett based Dancing4Fun is gearing up for it's 11th anniversary and its second annual Latin Dance Classic,
which will take place July 27 – 29, and will feature nine instructors
and over 20 hours of workshops and 15 hours of social dancing and
showcases.
“The Latin Dance Classic came about because I looked at the calendar and I thought, 'Dude, we've been in business for 10 years already!' It was a pretty big milestone, so I wanted to do something bigger than what I normally do,” explains Dancing4Fun owner Sean Christopher.
Read more...
“The Latin Dance Classic came about because I looked at the calendar and I thought, 'Dude, we've been in business for 10 years already!' It was a pretty big milestone, so I wanted to do something bigger than what I normally do,” explains Dancing4Fun owner Sean Christopher.
Read more...
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Atlanta dance events (3/2 - 3/8)
Part of my dance passion is promoting dance. Here is a list of dance events in ATL for the week. You can dance every day!
Atlanta Latin dance events (3/2 - 3/8)
Part of my dance passion is promoting dance. Here is a link to my list of Latin dance events in ATL for the week. I separate Latin because there are so many Latin events and Latin is my first love, so it gets its own spot. You can dance every day!
Monday, January 23, 2012
DANCE NO-NO: Unsolicited Advice
As in other realms of life, on the dance floor, free advice is worth roughly what you pay for it (just like this, har har har). The only difference is on the floor, even if the advice is worth gold, the adviser usually ends up looking like a jerk. You might think you're doing a good thing, helping someone learn, showing them a fascinating new trick, bringing out their potential. You're not. You're making yourself look like an ass.
Giving people dance advice they didn't ask for is beyond rude for a variety of reasons. First of all, you're implying they don't know what they're doing. It may be true that they don't know what they're doing, but of course, that's what being a beginner means. Everyone has their own learning process and chances are, someone who doesn't know how to dance but wants to is probably paying good money to take classes from professionals. Tis best to let the professionals be in charge of the lesson plan. In fact, even if someone asks, it might be better to direct him/her in a professional's direction.
Second, you're implying that you do know what you're doing. Unless someone has asked your advice or has paid you for dance lessons because you're a professional dance teacher, then what you have to say is best kept to yourself. You're likely not perfect and it would be in both your best interests not to act as if you are. It's especially bothersome when someone willingly acknowledges, "I'm just a beginner," or, "I'm just learning this dance," and some wannabe-Maksim-Chemerkovskiy takes that as an opportunity to flatter himself by acting like he's some kind of mentor to this poor, unfortunate, inexperienced dancer. Could the picture of arrogance be any more precisely painted?
And let's face it, I can personally issue you a 100% money-back guarantee that you are not as talented, knowledgeable or good looking as Maksim Chmerkovskiy, because if you were, you'd be doing what he does....but you're not, you're hanging out in bars, clubs, and dance studios backhandedly criticizing people. Maybe you have a bright future with TMZ, but certainly not as a dance instructor. Keep it to yourself.
Third, as many learned folks have said, "It takes a wise man to admit he's a fool." Beginners are well aware that they don't know what they're doing. It takes a lot of guts to learn anything new, least of all dancing, that some people are just too afraid to even try. They end up parked on the couch, hand in the Cheetos bag, eyes glued to Dancing with the Stars, all the while wishing they had the huevos to get up and dance. If someone is brave enough to get off that couch and learn, you should be proud of them, even if they're not dancing like a star. Don't forget, bravery isn't about not being scared. Bravery is about being terrified, but continuing anyway. Most beginners already feel like scared, shy, awkward, uncomfortable virgins. Just like in the bedroom, they don't need you reminding them how severely lacking their skills are. They won't have fun, they won't gain confidence, and they won't want to be with you again.Worse, they'll go tell all their friends what an asshat you are.
Last, I'm not sure what your parents taught you, but generally, in life, if you don't have something nice to say to somebody, STFU! People take up dance for various reasons. Some of them do it to get more exercise, some want to come out of their shells, some want to gain a better body image, and still some just want to go out and have fun. Since you never know someone's past, its best not to try to dictate their future. You're probably doing more harm than good. Even if you think it's valuable, life-altering information, there is no need to take the chance that you might hurt or discourage someone.
On the reverse side of the coin, if you happen to be the unfortunate recipient of this unsolicited "advice," don't put up with it! For whatever reason, you started dancing with a purpose and it took a lot of courage to start, and even more to continue. Don't let people take that from you. If someone tries to <s>insult</s> advise you when you didn't ask, politely, but sternly remind them, "I know I'm just a beginner, and I don't know a lot, and I appreciate that you want to help me learn, but I didn't ask."
If they put up a fight over it, tell them you'll ask the instructor later. If they still insist on "instructing you," though it might seem like you're stepping on toes, walk away. At that point, you've clearly communicated how you feel and they've clearly communicated they have no interest in listening.
Never be afraid to stand up for yourself! No one worth dancing with will blame you....then again, no one worth dancing with will say rude things like that to you either, but we all make mistakes. It's important, not only for your confidence to stand up for yourself, but also for your technique, to only take dance advice from professionals. If you take advice from every wannabe Maksim out there, you might spare their egos, but you'll end up confused because, as mentioned, if any of them were as good as he is, they'd be doing what he does, but they're not; and there are a LOT of wannabe Maksims out there. Trust me, their egos aren't worth sparing, especially at the expense of inhibiting your education.
Don't be rude.
Don't accept rudeness.
Giving people dance advice they didn't ask for is beyond rude for a variety of reasons. First of all, you're implying they don't know what they're doing. It may be true that they don't know what they're doing, but of course, that's what being a beginner means. Everyone has their own learning process and chances are, someone who doesn't know how to dance but wants to is probably paying good money to take classes from professionals. Tis best to let the professionals be in charge of the lesson plan. In fact, even if someone asks, it might be better to direct him/her in a professional's direction.
Second, you're implying that you do know what you're doing. Unless someone has asked your advice or has paid you for dance lessons because you're a professional dance teacher, then what you have to say is best kept to yourself. You're likely not perfect and it would be in both your best interests not to act as if you are. It's especially bothersome when someone willingly acknowledges, "I'm just a beginner," or, "I'm just learning this dance," and some wannabe-Maksim-Chemerkovskiy takes that as an opportunity to flatter himself by acting like he's some kind of mentor to this poor, unfortunate, inexperienced dancer. Could the picture of arrogance be any more precisely painted?
And let's face it, I can personally issue you a 100% money-back guarantee that you are not as talented, knowledgeable or good looking as Maksim Chmerkovskiy, because if you were, you'd be doing what he does....but you're not, you're hanging out in bars, clubs, and dance studios backhandedly criticizing people. Maybe you have a bright future with TMZ, but certainly not as a dance instructor. Keep it to yourself.
Third, as many learned folks have said, "It takes a wise man to admit he's a fool." Beginners are well aware that they don't know what they're doing. It takes a lot of guts to learn anything new, least of all dancing, that some people are just too afraid to even try. They end up parked on the couch, hand in the Cheetos bag, eyes glued to Dancing with the Stars, all the while wishing they had the huevos to get up and dance. If someone is brave enough to get off that couch and learn, you should be proud of them, even if they're not dancing like a star. Don't forget, bravery isn't about not being scared. Bravery is about being terrified, but continuing anyway. Most beginners already feel like scared, shy, awkward, uncomfortable virgins. Just like in the bedroom, they don't need you reminding them how severely lacking their skills are. They won't have fun, they won't gain confidence, and they won't want to be with you again.Worse, they'll go tell all their friends what an asshat you are.
Last, I'm not sure what your parents taught you, but generally, in life, if you don't have something nice to say to somebody, STFU! People take up dance for various reasons. Some of them do it to get more exercise, some want to come out of their shells, some want to gain a better body image, and still some just want to go out and have fun. Since you never know someone's past, its best not to try to dictate their future. You're probably doing more harm than good. Even if you think it's valuable, life-altering information, there is no need to take the chance that you might hurt or discourage someone.
On the reverse side of the coin, if you happen to be the unfortunate recipient of this unsolicited "advice," don't put up with it! For whatever reason, you started dancing with a purpose and it took a lot of courage to start, and even more to continue. Don't let people take that from you. If someone tries to <s>insult</s> advise you when you didn't ask, politely, but sternly remind them, "I know I'm just a beginner, and I don't know a lot, and I appreciate that you want to help me learn, but I didn't ask."
If they put up a fight over it, tell them you'll ask the instructor later. If they still insist on "instructing you," though it might seem like you're stepping on toes, walk away. At that point, you've clearly communicated how you feel and they've clearly communicated they have no interest in listening.
Never be afraid to stand up for yourself! No one worth dancing with will blame you....then again, no one worth dancing with will say rude things like that to you either, but we all make mistakes. It's important, not only for your confidence to stand up for yourself, but also for your technique, to only take dance advice from professionals. If you take advice from every wannabe Maksim out there, you might spare their egos, but you'll end up confused because, as mentioned, if any of them were as good as he is, they'd be doing what he does, but they're not; and there are a LOT of wannabe Maksims out there. Trust me, their egos aren't worth sparing, especially at the expense of inhibiting your education.
Don't be rude.
Don't accept rudeness.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Even the dance floor has a glass cieling
Although dancing is a predominantly female hobby, the female part of it has a high turnover rate. A lot of women take up dancing only to give it up a few months later. The reason? Men are at a premium.
Even in social dancing, a man has his pick of any woman he likes. Women don't have exactly the same options. Of course, it is the 21st century, so if women want to dance, they should be able to ask, right? In theory yes, but when the ratio is so imbalanced, there may not even be anyone to ask!
Old fashioned or not, it's extremely demoralizing for a woman if she always has to do the asking. She sees all the "hot" chicks, who may not even be good dancers, get snatched up every song, never waiting even a moment for a guy to ask her to dance. Meanwhile, the observer waits as long as an hour for a guy to ask her to dance. So, she waits, every minute her self esteem plummeting exponentially.
She knows it's not because of the guys' shyness because she sees them asking all those other women. If she's new, she may not be savvy to the unspoken snobbery that sometimes occurs (some people will only dance with people they know). If she's not new, it's all the more demoralizing. Is she too ugly? Is she too fat? Is she too old? Is she unsexy? Is her outfit wrong? Is she a terrible dancer? Is there some awful rumor going around about her? All of these thoughts catapult themselves against her confidence. A gal can only take so much bombardment before she breaks down.
Argue all you want about how her fate is in her own hands and if she wants to dance, she should ask the guys (though not sure how that works when there aren't any), but everyone knows how hurtful it is to be picked last or to never be picked at all, especially when you're not picked for superficial reasons. Yeah, yeah, it's her fault for not having confidence. Way to blame the victim. Besides, it's tough to have confidence when you're always beaten down. It's funny, combating bullying is all the rage these days because it hurts kids' self esteem so dramatically, but I guess when you grow up, how others treat you doesn't matter.
But I digress.....
Even gorgeous women who do get asked to dance all the time are at a disadvantage. If a woman, skilled or not, hot or not, wants to take her dance skills up a notch she will usually find herself incredibly frustrated at her inability to find a solid dance partner. Men are already at a premium, and men who want to dance in shows and competitions are even higher dollar. There are only a handful of them and most of them have partners already. If they don't, they are extremely picky about whom they'll consider.
She could also consider hiring a male dance instructor for pro-am competitions, but that costs quite a pretty penny. On average, private lessons cost anywhere from $75 up to $300. A pro-am instructor will want to practice at least twice a week, if not more. Unless the instructor owns a studio, then you'll also have to pay for floor fees in order to practice. Next, comes the competition, for which you pay registration. At first glance that one aspect might seem cheap. Some of them are as low as $25, but this is PER DANCE. Just like in other sports, there are "heats." You may have to participate in 10 heats, which means $250 more to cough up. We won't even talk travel costs, hotel stays, shoes, and costumes.
Maybe she can afford a few private lessons, even if they are between $75 and $300. She'll be happy because she'll have the attention and criticism she needs to become a better dancer, but then what? It's not like her instructor is going to dance with her in shows and competitions. It also doesn't solve the lack of partner problem. At best, she can take her newly found skills out on the social dance floor with her, but she won't be dancing with many people who are at the same level as her instructor. Like any other skill, use it or lose it.
For a much lower price than the two above, she can try a performance team. Lots of dance companies/instructors have performance teams that do a few shows for several local dance studios and socials. Some may travel out of state, some may not. She's still paying for the lessons and the floor fees, but with all the other couples on the team, the cost is significantly reduced. This is probably her best option. She will still learn a lot and will still get to do a few shows, but it still won't be a competition. If it's a competition she wants, then it's going to be a long, arduous journey.
All of these factors combined can leave some women extremely embittered to the point that they give up dancing altogether. Others stick with social dancing, all the while wishing they could do competitions and shows, but knowing the never will. It's a sad state of affairs and there is almost no remedy.
It's not to say that women get no satisfaction out of simply dancing socially. Most of them do. Shows and competitions aren't even in those women's minds. For the ladies that are looking for these opportunities and started somewhere after age 7, good luck to you!
Even in social dancing, a man has his pick of any woman he likes. Women don't have exactly the same options. Of course, it is the 21st century, so if women want to dance, they should be able to ask, right? In theory yes, but when the ratio is so imbalanced, there may not even be anyone to ask!
Old fashioned or not, it's extremely demoralizing for a woman if she always has to do the asking. She sees all the "hot" chicks, who may not even be good dancers, get snatched up every song, never waiting even a moment for a guy to ask her to dance. Meanwhile, the observer waits as long as an hour for a guy to ask her to dance. So, she waits, every minute her self esteem plummeting exponentially.
She knows it's not because of the guys' shyness because she sees them asking all those other women. If she's new, she may not be savvy to the unspoken snobbery that sometimes occurs (some people will only dance with people they know). If she's not new, it's all the more demoralizing. Is she too ugly? Is she too fat? Is she too old? Is she unsexy? Is her outfit wrong? Is she a terrible dancer? Is there some awful rumor going around about her? All of these thoughts catapult themselves against her confidence. A gal can only take so much bombardment before she breaks down.
Argue all you want about how her fate is in her own hands and if she wants to dance, she should ask the guys (though not sure how that works when there aren't any), but everyone knows how hurtful it is to be picked last or to never be picked at all, especially when you're not picked for superficial reasons. Yeah, yeah, it's her fault for not having confidence. Way to blame the victim. Besides, it's tough to have confidence when you're always beaten down. It's funny, combating bullying is all the rage these days because it hurts kids' self esteem so dramatically, but I guess when you grow up, how others treat you doesn't matter.
But I digress.....
Even gorgeous women who do get asked to dance all the time are at a disadvantage. If a woman, skilled or not, hot or not, wants to take her dance skills up a notch she will usually find herself incredibly frustrated at her inability to find a solid dance partner. Men are already at a premium, and men who want to dance in shows and competitions are even higher dollar. There are only a handful of them and most of them have partners already. If they don't, they are extremely picky about whom they'll consider.
She could also consider hiring a male dance instructor for pro-am competitions, but that costs quite a pretty penny. On average, private lessons cost anywhere from $75 up to $300. A pro-am instructor will want to practice at least twice a week, if not more. Unless the instructor owns a studio, then you'll also have to pay for floor fees in order to practice. Next, comes the competition, for which you pay registration. At first glance that one aspect might seem cheap. Some of them are as low as $25, but this is PER DANCE. Just like in other sports, there are "heats." You may have to participate in 10 heats, which means $250 more to cough up. We won't even talk travel costs, hotel stays, shoes, and costumes.
Maybe she can afford a few private lessons, even if they are between $75 and $300. She'll be happy because she'll have the attention and criticism she needs to become a better dancer, but then what? It's not like her instructor is going to dance with her in shows and competitions. It also doesn't solve the lack of partner problem. At best, she can take her newly found skills out on the social dance floor with her, but she won't be dancing with many people who are at the same level as her instructor. Like any other skill, use it or lose it.
For a much lower price than the two above, she can try a performance team. Lots of dance companies/instructors have performance teams that do a few shows for several local dance studios and socials. Some may travel out of state, some may not. She's still paying for the lessons and the floor fees, but with all the other couples on the team, the cost is significantly reduced. This is probably her best option. She will still learn a lot and will still get to do a few shows, but it still won't be a competition. If it's a competition she wants, then it's going to be a long, arduous journey.
All of these factors combined can leave some women extremely embittered to the point that they give up dancing altogether. Others stick with social dancing, all the while wishing they could do competitions and shows, but knowing the never will. It's a sad state of affairs and there is almost no remedy.
It's not to say that women get no satisfaction out of simply dancing socially. Most of them do. Shows and competitions aren't even in those women's minds. For the ladies that are looking for these opportunities and started somewhere after age 7, good luck to you!
Friday, December 2, 2011
Excuses, excuses
So many people sit back and watch dancing shows on TV, all the while lamenting to themselves, "I could never dance like that." You could, actually, but you make excuse upon excuse not to. Here are some of the top excuses and why they're wrong.
I can't afford it. If you want to dress like the folks on Dancing with the Stars, you're right. You probably can't afford that, but neither can anyone that doesn't have Mickey Mouse's budget. In most cities, you can find studios and clubs that offer dance socials for as cheap as $7. The most expensive will be $20 and most of these socials include a basic dance lesson and people usually wear casual clothes. Your one investment is a good pair of dance shoes.
When it comes to any other hobby, people are willing to pay a lot more than it costs to dance. Take tennis for example. First, you have to either pay court fees or join a country club or neighborhood tennis association in order to use the court. Then you have to pay for lessons. Then, if you want to compete, you have to pay to join some organization such as ALTA or USTA. On top of that, you buy a racket, tennis balls, tennis shoes, a bag, a water bottle, appropriate court clothing. Similar expenses are necessary for any sport. All those things are way more expensive than the only real investment you need to make as a dancer: a good pair of dance shoes. In the worst case scenario, there are street shoes for both men and women that will suffice (don't tell Capezio I said that).
I don't have a dance partner and/or my romantic partner won't do it. Leave your romantic partner at home. In fact, go ahead and leave your romantic partner permanently because you don't need to waste your time on anyone who is too scared to try something new or who won't do something nice once in a while just to make you happy. Ladies, how many times have you sat through a three hour movie with a title like, "Explosionville: The Apocalypse," because you loved your man? Or, gentlemen, you know you've done the same thing for your lady only with titles like, "The Girl Who Did Stuff and Then Found Herself." Just sayin'.
If divorce isn't an option or if you're single, never fear. Most people who dance socially don't have dance partners either. Often, if they have romantic partners, they'll usually dance with everyone else anyway. This could be a problem if you want to participate in competitions, but it would be wise to try dancing socially before diving into shows and competitions. Even at that point, Jack 'n' Jill is a very common type of competition. You don't dance with a predetermined partner, you're just set up with another dancer and you may even switch partners.
I'm too old. No you're not. The end.
I'm too.......(complaint). These complaints are usually made by someone who is uncomfortable with her/his looks. Sure, the dancers on So You Think You Can Dance and Dancing with the Stars are all very glamorous, attractive people, but that's TV. Even those folks are severely enhanced with makeup, spray tans, lighting, and high quality camera work. You don't have to look like a TV star to do any of your other hobbies, do you? Dancing is one of the most diverse activities on the planet. People of all shapes, sizes, ages, genders, sexual orientations, belief systems, cultures, colors, etc., participate in dancing.
It's "gay." No, sports are gay. Guys who dance professionally might wear frilly costumes and heeled shoes, but you know what they don't do? They don't slap each others' asses every time one of them makes a good move and then all get naked together in the shower after a competition. They also usually dance with women, who are often in skimpy clothing, whereas, in sports, there are usually nothing but men in tight pants on both teams. So, you tell me what's gayer. Not to disparage sports, homosexuality, or male-on-man grab-ass, but if you can handle those blatantly homosexual behaviors in sports, why can't you handle any slightly homosexual aspects of dance? Besides, in social dancing, guys usually don't wear all the frills, sparkles, and heels. To your benefit, a lot more women dance than men. No matter what you look like, you will have your pick of any lady you like and won't have to sit down for even a minute if you don't want to.
I'm not coordinated enough. Yes you are, you just have to try, try, try. You don't expect to paint the Mona Lisa the first time you pick up a paint brush, so why do you think the first time you step on the dance floor, you're going to dance like Baryshnikov? You were pretty darn awkward when you learned to walk, but now you do it every day without thinking.
I don't want to look stupid. Well, that's okay because no one is really looking anyway. When you take a class, most of the other people in the class are focused on their own learning process. They're not even really paying attention to you. When it comes to mistakes in dance, most people have a goldfish's memory. They might see you do something silly and laugh at the time, but three seconds later, they've forgotten about it, because they're back to focusing on their own learning.
I won't know anybody there. Grow up. When's the last time you started any activity where you knew the majority of people there?
I tried a few times but nobody danced with me. This is an unfortunate aspect of the dance world that nobody likes to admit exists. There is a problem with being the new kid. There is no denying it. The only solution is to increase your face time with those folks. Go dancing as much as possible. Even if no one dances with you, people will start to remember your face and you will become familiar to them. You may even want to approach the instructor. Most of them are friendly and are happy to introduce you to other folks. It takes time. In fact, Latin dancers even have a term for this, Salsa Hell. Yes, this can be extremely difficult on the self esteem, but we've all been there. After you survive it and you become an experienced dancer, take it as your personal responsibility to welcome to new dancers.
Go ahead, try to make an excuse not to dance, but you know the only real thing holding you back is you!
I can't afford it. If you want to dress like the folks on Dancing with the Stars, you're right. You probably can't afford that, but neither can anyone that doesn't have Mickey Mouse's budget. In most cities, you can find studios and clubs that offer dance socials for as cheap as $7. The most expensive will be $20 and most of these socials include a basic dance lesson and people usually wear casual clothes. Your one investment is a good pair of dance shoes.
When it comes to any other hobby, people are willing to pay a lot more than it costs to dance. Take tennis for example. First, you have to either pay court fees or join a country club or neighborhood tennis association in order to use the court. Then you have to pay for lessons. Then, if you want to compete, you have to pay to join some organization such as ALTA or USTA. On top of that, you buy a racket, tennis balls, tennis shoes, a bag, a water bottle, appropriate court clothing. Similar expenses are necessary for any sport. All those things are way more expensive than the only real investment you need to make as a dancer: a good pair of dance shoes. In the worst case scenario, there are street shoes for both men and women that will suffice (don't tell Capezio I said that).
I don't have a dance partner and/or my romantic partner won't do it. Leave your romantic partner at home. In fact, go ahead and leave your romantic partner permanently because you don't need to waste your time on anyone who is too scared to try something new or who won't do something nice once in a while just to make you happy. Ladies, how many times have you sat through a three hour movie with a title like, "Explosionville: The Apocalypse," because you loved your man? Or, gentlemen, you know you've done the same thing for your lady only with titles like, "The Girl Who Did Stuff and Then Found Herself." Just sayin'.
If divorce isn't an option or if you're single, never fear. Most people who dance socially don't have dance partners either. Often, if they have romantic partners, they'll usually dance with everyone else anyway. This could be a problem if you want to participate in competitions, but it would be wise to try dancing socially before diving into shows and competitions. Even at that point, Jack 'n' Jill is a very common type of competition. You don't dance with a predetermined partner, you're just set up with another dancer and you may even switch partners.
I'm too old. No you're not. The end.
I'm too.......(complaint). These complaints are usually made by someone who is uncomfortable with her/his looks. Sure, the dancers on So You Think You Can Dance and Dancing with the Stars are all very glamorous, attractive people, but that's TV. Even those folks are severely enhanced with makeup, spray tans, lighting, and high quality camera work. You don't have to look like a TV star to do any of your other hobbies, do you? Dancing is one of the most diverse activities on the planet. People of all shapes, sizes, ages, genders, sexual orientations, belief systems, cultures, colors, etc., participate in dancing.
It's "gay." No, sports are gay. Guys who dance professionally might wear frilly costumes and heeled shoes, but you know what they don't do? They don't slap each others' asses every time one of them makes a good move and then all get naked together in the shower after a competition. They also usually dance with women, who are often in skimpy clothing, whereas, in sports, there are usually nothing but men in tight pants on both teams. So, you tell me what's gayer. Not to disparage sports, homosexuality, or male-on-man grab-ass, but if you can handle those blatantly homosexual behaviors in sports, why can't you handle any slightly homosexual aspects of dance? Besides, in social dancing, guys usually don't wear all the frills, sparkles, and heels. To your benefit, a lot more women dance than men. No matter what you look like, you will have your pick of any lady you like and won't have to sit down for even a minute if you don't want to.
I'm not coordinated enough. Yes you are, you just have to try, try, try. You don't expect to paint the Mona Lisa the first time you pick up a paint brush, so why do you think the first time you step on the dance floor, you're going to dance like Baryshnikov? You were pretty darn awkward when you learned to walk, but now you do it every day without thinking.
I don't want to look stupid. Well, that's okay because no one is really looking anyway. When you take a class, most of the other people in the class are focused on their own learning process. They're not even really paying attention to you. When it comes to mistakes in dance, most people have a goldfish's memory. They might see you do something silly and laugh at the time, but three seconds later, they've forgotten about it, because they're back to focusing on their own learning.
I won't know anybody there. Grow up. When's the last time you started any activity where you knew the majority of people there?
I tried a few times but nobody danced with me. This is an unfortunate aspect of the dance world that nobody likes to admit exists. There is a problem with being the new kid. There is no denying it. The only solution is to increase your face time with those folks. Go dancing as much as possible. Even if no one dances with you, people will start to remember your face and you will become familiar to them. You may even want to approach the instructor. Most of them are friendly and are happy to introduce you to other folks. It takes time. In fact, Latin dancers even have a term for this, Salsa Hell. Yes, this can be extremely difficult on the self esteem, but we've all been there. After you survive it and you become an experienced dancer, take it as your personal responsibility to welcome to new dancers.
Go ahead, try to make an excuse not to dance, but you know the only real thing holding you back is you!
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Welcome
Welcome to the blog for Dance Infotainment. My goal with dance infotainment is to provide the world's most comprehensive online dance resource.
I realized what a struggle it was for me to get up and dance when I first started. If there was a community of dance information, advice, tips, activities, studios, teachers, Q&A, and product reviews, I would have started dancing more quickly. This also helps veteran dancers connect and diversify their skills.
In the blog section, I'll be providing personal experiences, perspectives, and commentaries. This is altogether separate from the other articles I will post. If it's an article, it will have input from official people. If it's a blog, it's strictly my thoughts.
I hope you find everything related to Dance Infotainment to be both entertaining and informative. See you on the dance floor!
I realized what a struggle it was for me to get up and dance when I first started. If there was a community of dance information, advice, tips, activities, studios, teachers, Q&A, and product reviews, I would have started dancing more quickly. This also helps veteran dancers connect and diversify their skills.
In the blog section, I'll be providing personal experiences, perspectives, and commentaries. This is altogether separate from the other articles I will post. If it's an article, it will have input from official people. If it's a blog, it's strictly my thoughts.
I hope you find everything related to Dance Infotainment to be both entertaining and informative. See you on the dance floor!
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